A lot of my clients complain that the men who respond to them online are just random guys looking for a hookup. Nothing special, not trying to court them or even bothering to write a decent email. When I ask what kind of profile they have posted they usually tell me it’s basic, generic, breezy. That can be a problem if you’re looking for quality. When you post an online dating profile that attempts to appeal to everyone and don’t make it unique, you blend in with everyone else on the site. That’s not what you want.
So many people are online these days and you need to stand out if you want to get quality dates. Your profile and pictures are all you have going for you until you actually meet, so you need to make the most of them. Be serious about this and you’ll get better results.
Write a good profile. Unless you are a 22 year-old supermodel, you need to write a good profile. I can’t say this enough. Of course, there are guys who won’t read it. Yes, you will still get random emails from unsuitable men. You will still need to reach out and write a few emails yourself, but writing a good profile is your best shot at getting a great guy to write to you or respond to you if you write to him first.
A good online dating profile tells him who you are, helps you stand out and gives him something to talk about when he writes to you.
It can really help to cut down on awkward, generic first emails if you’ve got something in your profile that he can relate to. There are great resources for the writing-challenged; everything from e-courses to professionally written profiles. Whatever you do, get your profile right.
Spring for decent pictures. In an online world, a pic is all you’ve got. He’s never going to click on that genius profile you worked so hard on if your photo is awful. Why should he when there are so many other pictures to click on?
Don’t get upset about men being superficial. We are all visual and this is online dating. He doesn’t know you yet and chances are he never will if you don’t have a good picture for him to click on. So get one!
Go to the salon, get your makeup done, wear a great outfit and spring for a photographer if you can. This can be a bit pricey but this is your love life we’re talking about. You are worth it. If you’re seriously pressed for cash, you can get together with a friend and have him or her take some pictures, but please have good ones. No fair using old pics. You don’t like it when guys do this, so don’t do it to them.
Once you’ve gone live with your new profile and pictures, it’s time to see what results you get and be willing to tweak what you’ve written. Your profile should be a work in progress.
See what kind of emails you get and write good responses to the ones you like. Don’t get upset when the wrong guys email you. This will happen and you can just press the delete button and move on.
If you’ve done a good job with this, you should start getting some emails from the kinds of guys you want to date. Hopefully, you mentioned what you were looking for in your profile. Also, be willing to reach out and write a few emails yourself. One a day is plenty, just be willing to spend time on the website every day and do this. Consistency is key.
You can get fantastic results with online dating if you invest the time and energy to get it right. It isn’t magic, but it’s the best thing going for anyone who can’t be out and about every single night trying to meet new people. Don’t give up.
If you enjoyed this post and you’re ready to find the love of your life, check out my free video series “3 ways to find the love you want”.