You’ve finally posted your profile online and you’re talking to a few guys. So far, so good. Hopefully, you’re getting some attention and are excited about the possibility of going on some dates. Then, you look at your phone and there it is, a picture of…
You’ve got to be kidding! That’s not what you signed up for.
Before you shut down your profile and swear off online dating for good, please read on.
In my opinion, sending inappropriate pictures early in a relationship is disrespectful. The men you’re going to want to date will not do this.
If you’ve received an inappropriate picture from a man you’re just getting to know, I’d encourage you to think about three things: your profile, how you screen dates, and how you correspond with the men you’re talking to.
First, check out your profile. Is it super sexy? Do you have revealing pictures? Have you posted shots of you and your friends tying one on at happy hour?
Is your profile written to appeal to relationship-minded men or did you toss up a few quick paragraphs saying that you’re fun and looking for adventure?
There’s nothing wrong with happy hour, being sexy or fun, but keep your intended audience in mind. If you want a long-term relationship, post a profile that says so clearly and make sure that your pictures match the image you want to portray.
Second, screen your dates effectively. You don’t have to try to meet seven men a week for coffee or drinks. Online dating doesn’t have to be churning through men at the speed of light.
Take the time to look at men’s profiles and see what they wrote, speak to them on the phone before agreeing to meet, and go on real dates instead of interviews. Don’t decide to date a man solely because he has a nice picture or job description. Get to know a man a bit before you commit to spending time with him.
Finally, consider how you correspond with the men you’re talking to. Do you allow them to text on and on without phone calls or dates? Are you getting drawn into conversations about subjects that make you uncomfortable?
Remember that dating is for you and act accordingly. If something makes you uncomfortable, you don’t have to go along with it. Make it clear what you want.
If a man is disrespectful, he’s not your guy. Take heart though, most men respect women who know what they want and are willing to take responsibility for themselves.
If you’re attracting guys who aren’t respectful, double-check your profile and pictures. Then, read their profiles carefully before you give out your number. You’ll have much higher quality dates and fewer inappropriate pictures on your phone.
If you enjoyed this post and you’re ready to find the love of your life, check out my free video series “3 ways to find the love you want”.