Everyone’s dated a Mr. Almost. Maybe you knew from the start that something was off but you went with it because, well, he was there. Maybe you were lonely, at a low point in your life or he was persistent. Whatever the case, you’re now questioning whether or not to stay with him.
There are two kinds of Mr. Almost, Mr. Not-Perfect and Mr. Deal-Breaker. The best thing to do is determine which one you’re dealing with and act accordingly.
Mr. Not-Perfect can show up when you’re trying to hold out for Mr. Perfect. You want a rich, handsome, Ivy League educated guy and you’re still hoping that he comes along, but in the meantime you’re dating a wonderful man who is treating you like a queen.
If you’re super young or not looking to settle down at this time in your life, go ahead and dump Mr. Not-Perfect and have a blast dating around. Get it out of your system and create some rocking chair memories that you will cherish (or regret) later in life. Experience is the best teacher if you learn from it.
On the other hand, if you’re seeking a long-term connection, I highly recommend doing whatever you can to adjust your expectations and keep him. This is not settling, it’s called getting your head out of your own backside.
Holding out for Mr. Perfect will work against you in the long run. If the man in your life has the most important qualities you seek in a mate and you dump him, you will probably regret it. The world is full of rich handsome men who are either not going to be interested in you or will not treat you well.
The second kind of Mr. Almost is Mr. Deal-Breaker. Something’s off that you know you can’t live with, but you’re hoping that it goes away, changes or otherwise evaporates so that you don’t have to deal with it. This is a situation that needs to be remedied immediately.
Putting your head in the sand will not fix anything. If you are hoping that something will change, move on now.
Your only two options in any relationship are to live with him as he is or move on.
Changing your man is not on the menu. It’s not fair to him, even if you think it’s for the best. He’s a grown man and he didn’t decide to date you so that you could fix him.
He’s looking for someone who will accept and love him. He deserves to have this and so do you. If that is never going to happen in this relationship, then move on and find someone you can accept.
Whichever type of Mr. Almost is in your life right now, decide what your priorities are and whether or not you can accept this person as he is now. Can you accept the relationship as it is now? Are your expectations in dating realistic?
Once you figure out where you’re going and what you want, you’ll know what to do. Then, all that remains is to have the courage to do it.
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