Is your relationship costing you your peace of mind, sense of self, or the company of those you love? Do you spend more time fighting than enjoying each others’ company? Do your needs go unmet or unacknowledged? If the answer to these questions is yes, then you may be in a toxic relationship.
Toxic relationships are emotionally and sometimes physically damaging to one or both partners. They are draining, unhealthy, and they steal our joy.
If you have a hunch that you’re in a toxic relationship, you probably are. While it is tempting to simply leave the relationship and find someone new, I’d like to encourage you to take a closer look at the dynamics that created this situation in your life.
If you work toward understanding your part in this, you’ll be much less likely to find yourself in the same kind of relationship again.
First, take a good look at where you are. Sit down and take off the rose-colored glasses. Are you happy in your relationship, able to be yourself, feeling supported? If not, why?
How long has it been since your needs have been met? Is he having a bad week at work or has it been months since you’ve been able to talk about anything without being stonewalled? Get some perspective.
If your friends and family hate him this is a big red flag. Your friends and family love you and have your best interests at heart. You may tell yourself that they don’t understand and you’re right. They don’t understand why you’re allowing this to happen to yourself. Why are you?
Understand that you have agreed to be in this relationship. Things are the way they are and you have tolerated them. You may continue to do so or not.
If you’ve had some conversations about what your needs are and how they’re not being met, then your partner knows where you stand. If you haven’t, then start now. If you’re afraid to do this, ask yourself why you’re in a relationship where you’re afraid to ask for what you need. Don’t you want to be with someone who cares about you and wants you to have what you need?
These are tough questions, but they must be addressed, because if they aren’t you won’t be able to move into something better.
What will you do now? You’ve asked yourself and your significant other some honest questions and hopefully, you have some answers. What will you do with them?
Do you need to check in again? Do you need to move on? I can’t answer this for you, but I can tell you that you will feel it in your heart. You know what is best for you and you need to stand for it. One of your great missions in this world is to take responsibility for yourself and your own life. Do this now and you will not regret it.
Stand for the life that you want to have and make sure that you get to live it. No one else is going to come along and give this to you, so determine that you will give this gift to yourself.
If you enjoyed this post and would like some support in figuring out what your next step should be in your journey toward love, click here to book a complimentary discovery call with me!